Posted by: dianaiannarone | January 12, 2017

Love Alignment, Makes Manipulation End

get-love-alignedWhat does it mean to be in alignment with love?

I’m willing to wager that there are people reading these words now who are very much filled with love. They have empathy, they care deeply for others, and they live their life to make a profound difference in the world.

These people are devoted, loyal, and can see the needs and the pain of others. They are sometimes termed as empaths; those that sense the feelings and suffering of others. These characteristics are a gift, however left unchecked, they can also be a curse. Devotion and love to those that value it and us is a beautiful gift, yet we need to be aware of people that might wish to simply capitalize on our devotion. Those that might fraudulently present themselves so that we might work harder and be more devoted—to save them.

How is it we can tell the difference between the genuine need of others, and those that are sociopathic/narcissistic and are merely using what we avail to them?

Examine a few things.

First, look internally. Stop and remember your own existence.

Are you hurting? And if so, why are you hurting? Why are you suffering? Often it is because in the formula of love we have neglected to examine ourselves and how we are being treated. How well are you taking care of yourself? How well are you loving yourself?

We do not need to endure pain to be a good spouse, parent, friend or even employee. We cannot leave ourselves out of the formula of love.

Does your devotion to love include yourself fully? Are you living within your own value system? Are you violating yourself or allowing others to, in any way? Are you speaking what you deserve, but tolerating something different?

Second, in all instances, also look externally. Examine the actions and words of those around you. Do they line up? If not look for those incongruences. Those situations where one thing is said, and another thing is done. Track these incongruences.

I find most people have an external locus of control. I define this as being driven by circumstances and needs outside of themselves. Which again, on the surface can be beautiful. However, true happiness, contentment, and peace, comes when we can turn toward an internal locus of control. Being driven by our truth, examining what is for THE highest good and honoring that. It is critical we listen to our own inner knowing, our own inner promptings. Whether you believe that is your intuition, God, or simply some force within you, is not as relevant as choosing to honor it. For in honoring it, you honor not only yourself, you also honor THE highest good, and remove yourself from the risk of being defeated, by enduring pain and suffering at the hands of a manipulator. We get to choose the quality of our life.

If you are easily driven by guilt, if guilt makes you act, then you are susceptible to being manipulated. Guilt and shame should only serve if you have actually done something wrong, something that YOU measure as wrong. Yet, a skilled manipulator will use guilt and shame as a tool to control you.

Don’t ever try to convince anyone of who you are. And if you find that you are frequently put in a position of feeling the need to defend yourself, even though by your own measure you have not done anything wrong, then be aware, you may be under the control of someone else. A choice you are making, that can be changed.

We get to say no. We get to place boundaries as necessary. And we get to live life fully on our terms. It is a courageous act to align with love, and include yourself in the formula. That courage can lift you from the deepest despair and allow you to feel free flowing joy and the knowing you are acting from a place of love for the highest good.

True love and connection is why we are here. Anything in contrast is not something we need to endure. It may be hard to let go, yet the quality of your life may depend on it. You can have the life you desire. Get aligned with love and you can block anything that might otherwise defeat you.

Wake Up to how you’re operating from past hurts, Stand Up for your non-negotiable qualities and Live Free into your next reality.

Life is not meant to be a struggle, and healing from harsh forces is a beautiful, gentle awakening to the one limiting core belief—the red thorn—that can be gently released (not extracted).

Cut Your Root of Captivity.

Email for a free initial consultation. Or order our Guide to Freedom

“Me & My Shadow” by Diana Iannarone on Amazon.

We do not give legal advice, nor do we use legal principles to apply to your circumstances. We are neither lawyers nor medical professionals

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